SGZ FUNNY JOKES CORNER

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Welcome to SGZ Joke's Corner. Just keep laffin

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SGZ



She said Hi sugar,
I said Hi milk.
She blocked me😢
I thought we wanted to prepare Tea ..LOL

      Comment or Share        Posted: 4 months ago

SGZ



No drug is as effective as a bank credit alert.it can wake up ur dead cells in a matter of minutes, return ur lost appetite n even make u smile in a funeral service.may credit alert be a regular part of our live 😀😀😀

      Comment or Share        Posted: 5 months ago

SGZ



Introducing your female friends to your boyfriend is like displaying different kinds of meat to a dog...
Because he will eventually eat them all.
Lols . .
Hands up to all the sharp guys on SGZ, lols.....
I no mention names ooooo

      Comment or Share        Posted: 5 months ago

SGZ



SOME LECTURERS FROM A UNIVERSITY IN NIGERIA, FACULTY OF ENGINEERING BOARDED A PLANE.
WHEN THE PLANE WAS READY TO TAKE-OFF, THE PILOT SAID......"WELCOME ON BOARD LADIES & GENTLEMEN MAY I PLEASE INFORM YOU THAT THIS PLANE WAS MANUFACTURED BY YOUR STUDENTS IN THE UNIVERSITY AND THIS IS THE FIRST TIME OF FLYING"..
IMMEDIATELY THEY HEARD THAT, EVERYONE RAN OUT OF THE PLANE EXCEPT ONE PROFESSOR IBRAHIM, WHO SAT COMFORTABLY. PEOPLE WERE SURPRISED AND WENT TO HIS SEAT TO ASK HIM WHY HE DID NOT RUN OUT OF THE PLANE LIKE OTHERS? .
HE SMILED AND REPLIED..."THERE IS NO NEED TO RUN OUT BECAUSE IF IT IS TRUE THAT THIS PLANE WAS MADE BY OUR STUDENTS, THEN WITH WHAT WE TAUGHT THEM, AM VERY SURE THE PLANE WILL NOT EVEN MOVE"..
Pls don't laugh all alone. Just to put a smile on someone's face as we struggle to live.

      Comment or Share        Posted: 5 months ago

SGZ



Some girls can post on Facebook, "I love u baby" without tagging anybody...
This is wht I called killing two birds with one stone.
😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😉 😉 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 5 months ago

SGZ



We went out on a date and you want me to use Fork and knife to Eat chicken. Babe, the Animal is
already dead, there's no need to use weapons. 😂 😂 😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 5 months ago

SGZ



Me dat survived 9 months in my mom's belly without light..
Nepa dn't even knw me oo..
Since morning they refused to bring light nd they tink they are doing me ...
For dia pomo mind lols

      Comment or Share        Posted: 5 months ago

SGZ



I fainted 5 times when I overheard one IBADAN girl who said
"Beauty is in the eyes of the Decoder"
Immediately I woke up, she told the guy who tried to correct her that
" SCIENCE is the best answer for a fool like you"
My dear shift let me faint again?

      Comment or Share        Posted: 5 months ago

Mimi



What is Gbege???
Gbege is that moment you log in to facebook with battery of 1%, and seconds
later, your boss uploads his pics with his wife and kids.
Just to impress him, you commented "cool pics",
but the auto correction on your phone changed it to "cool pigs", just then,
your phone went off.
My dear no need to explain, just begin to search for a new job.


GOOD MONI FAN, TGIF
Read more on SGZ CHAT Jokes Corner

      Comment or Share        Posted: 5 months ago

VIK



Nowadays..
Nigerian guys:can beg 4 sex Ehnnn.....
You'll hear Baby OK let me just put d head inside,
Only d head.
I promise not to put everything.........
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Softcode



My friend Tolu saw two names on her boos phone - 'Tolu Small Breast' & 'Tolu my Love'
She called the first one n her phone started ringing..😅😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Softcode



U are sick n U want him to send U MTN 1500,
shey U wan recharge the malaria?
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Softcode



Its only in Ikotun a girl will borrow her friends cloth to go & visit a guy who borrowed his friends room.
Complicated People😂😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Softcode



Rain will fall for 1 hour, Just 1 hour oh And NEPA will use 3 days to dry wire
God bless my dear coountry, we are just too much. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Softcode



How do I convince my Yoruba neighbor dat it was a mistake.I use her Ewedu broom sweep toilet.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Softcode



Can u imaqine this slayqueen of facebook just asked me if i have NYSC past questions.
As in ehn....
Nothin we no dey see for Naija gals
this one weak me😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

SGZ



Dear ladies,
If u follow ur fiancées to meet his mother and she serves u food with 4 meats,
Please I beg u, eat only 1 and leave the rest for her! oo
It's a trap oo 😩😂
You hear me 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Softcode



When a guy isn't interested in a relationship anymore he can say anything just to breakup with you...
He might say baby I cant continue any longer your mum didnt write Waec😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
we guys sha .. we too much

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Softcode



if you tell your boyfriend you want to come and see him and he says he is broke 😌😌You're a bad girlfriend 😣😣... Boyfriend should not have to worry about how much money he has in his pocket every time he has to meet you 👉🏿
True or false ?

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

SGZ



When you are not fasting,
you can stay till afternoon without feeling hungry.
But during fasting, Even TV remote will start looking like Gala in your Eyes. Lols . .

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

SGZ



AIRTEL think they are wise
Ever since I borrowed #500 from them,
They have been sending me messages like "Recharge #500 and get #2500

......imposicant ... Lols

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Walex



I saw a lady wearing a ring on the wrong finger and I asked her why? She said it is because she married a wrong man

Lols . . . Pls always choose right

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

Faith



An Edo Man invited his friends for his mother's burial. After lowering the coffin, the family put yam, rice, meat etc, into the grave in line with tradition.
A Hausa Man asked why? The Edo man smiled and said,"According to our tradition, the dead go on a long journey and need all the food items they can get". The Hausa man dropped N100,000 inside and said, "When the food finish, buy more". The Yoruba man dropped N50,000 and said, "Add this in case it's not enough."The Igbo man smiled and brought out his cheque book and wrote a cheque of N200,000, dropped it in the coffin and took the N150,000 notes as change, then said "Nwanne, withdraw it when you reach dia oooo!!.. It is going to be a dangerous journey, we don't know how many robbers are out there and afterall we are in a cashless economy. Travel well oooo

! Igbo Kwenu!!

      Comment or Share        Posted: 6 months ago

SGZ



SGZ Chat is truly 100% fun oo, incase you dnt know.
A gal visited SGZ Jokes Corner.
She Laff and Laff till her phone fell off from her hands.
Now, her phone screen is broken and she ask SGZ Chat Admin to pay for damages .
She is serious about it ooo.
But the most funniest tin is that up till now, she is still laffing .. .
😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀

      Comment or Share        Posted: 7 months ago

SGZ



I beg, I cant laugh alone!
Pls say your mind on this...

Two of my friends came visiting with their female partners and we decided 2 go out on a picnic, along with my little cousin brother.
After packing d food and all we needed, we set off to a quite beach.
After chatting for few minutes, we decided to eat and began unpacking d basket which has the food in it, only for us to discover we forgot the spoons at home. I told my little cousin to go get it while we wait.
He replied with disapproval saying
*''I know u want to trick me so you can eat d whole food b4 I come back''*.
I promised him we will wait for his arrival, but he disagreed.
After much persuasion and promises, he decided to go. My friends and I started chatting and gisting to whirl away time and wait for my cousin's arrival.
After 1hr, there was no sign of him. 2hrs went by, and I began wondering wot could have delayed him bcoz d distance between our house and d beach can be covered within 30mins.
My friends and I were already going hungry but we decided to wait a little longer for my cousin's return.
After 4hrs, the hunger was so unbearable that we decided to taste the food. As we were about tasting, we heard a rumble in a nearby bush and dere, my cousin appeared 4rm behind a tree shouting *"I said it, I knew you would eat the food before I return,
I'M NOT GOING AGAIN"*.
Please if u were in my shoes, what would you have done to your cousin brother....??
Pls say ur mind 😀.

      Comment or Share        Posted: 7 months ago

SGZ



Stop calling workers with old titles. Just use new titles. Please address them accordingly and they will like it and work *HARDER* for you.

OLD: *Garden Boy*
NEW: *Landscape Executive and Animal Nutritionist*

OLD: *Receptionist*
NEW: *Front Desk Controler*

OLD: *Typist*
NEW: *Printed Document Handler*

OLD: *Messenger*
NEW: *Business Communication Conveyer*

OLD: *Window Cleaner*
NEW: *Transparent Wall Technician*

OLD: *Temporary Teacher*
NEW: *Associate Tutor*

OLD: *Tea Boy*
NEW: *Refreshment Director*

OLD: *Garbage Collector*
NEW: *Environmental Sanitation Technician*

OLD: *Guard*
NEW: *Security Enforcement Director*

OLD: *Prostitute*
NEW: *Practical Sexual Relations Officer*

OLD: *Thief*
NEW: *Wealth Distribution Officer*

OLD: *Driver*
NEW: *Automobile Propulsion Specialist*

OLD: *Maid*
NEW: *Domestics Managing Director*

OLD: *Cook*
NEW: *Food Chemist*

OLD: *Gossip*
NEW: *Oral Research and Evaluation Director*

      Comment or Share        Posted: 7 months ago

SGZ



AVOID SLEEPING IN CHURCH!!* its very bad
I was sleeping in church last Sunday and the usher woke me up...
Immediately when he woke me up from my sleep the next thing I heard was the pastor saying...
"Please stand up"
I stood up without knowing the reason and the people were clapping for me! Surprisingly for me I look around and I was the only one standing up ...then the next thing I heard. ...
*PASTOR*:- "Thank you Jesus!!! Any other person who will give us another one million cash for our church project ?"
*I Fainted* ...hahaha...
dont laugh all alone okay

      Comment or Share        Posted: 7 months ago

Bose



A 9-year-old boy stole N500 from his mothers purse, the mother caught him and gave him serious beating.
The angry mother held the boys ear and asked him.
Do you know where stealing will take you to? Surprisingly the boy said Yes, the mother shockingly asked him where?

The boy replied National Assembly Abuja.

      Comment or Share        Posted: 7 months ago